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oh for the love of mike….

Posted by Allison on May 31, 2006

Okay, I’ve always said “for the love of mike” I don’t know who mike is but I’m assuming he’s an asshole. Actually to be fair, I’ve never met a mike that I liked. well that’s not true, i’ve often liked a mike or two, but invaritably they turn into an asshole. probably shouldn’t mention I have a brother in law named mike. but i digress. i’m done. i’m done with hearing about celebrity offspring. PLEASE make it stop. I’m fine with entertainment shows and their frenzy but since when should i have to turn on CNN and hear about the latest and of course genetically superior baby born to some freaks that quite frankly i don’t give a rat’s ass about.

you want to here amazing birth stories. i gave birth to a kid with a 14 inch circumferance head on my living room floor with no drugs, no doctor, no stirrups, no ice chips. i gave birth with my husband and a midwife and a kiddie pool with fish on it. you wanna silent birth? my 12 year old slept through the whole thing and the only pain relief i had was a midwife who kept telling me how powerful i was. put that on your fucking CNN. combine my name with dh and talk about it on every damn news channel. i didn’t cost the tax payers one red cent. i didn’t hold small countries hostage for 300.000 bucks. and the next day i got up, and lived my frickin’ life. without pissing off anyone because of traffic or ridiculous statements about things i know nothing about and without having to issue any type of press release.

4 Responses to “oh for the love of mike….”

  1. Dipsy Doodle said

    Hm – got me pondering here with the Mike-thing… upon further thinking I realized that the “Mikes” I know suck big time too – could it be the name? LOL 🙂 There’s one Mike I’d love to meet one day, and if he turns out to be an asshole too, then we should start the “Anti-Mike-Fanclub” or such…
    I’m here with you about the celebrity-birth-yuck-noghtmares, like you I’m so sick and tired about that, I could puke every time I come across such articles or news or whatever. It sucks big time! “Normal” people have so much more interesting stories to tell, have lived through so much more, have survived so much more – they are the real heroes and would deserve their name be known. But then again – would we want those paparazzi hanging at our tail all the time? No, we wouldn’t – so let the so-called “stars” be bothered by them, and let us just simply ignore them – best we can, though it’s hardly possible these days… 😦

  2. Divine Ladi said

    LOL!!! That was so funny! I’ve met Mike’s too and they all turn out to be the same.

    *standing ovation* That was an amazing birth! Wow….

  3. Divine Ladi said

    By the way, thanks for stopping by my blog and the well wishes.

  4. KNITWHIT said

    And one of my favorite quotes:

    A perfect parent is a person with excellent child-rearing theories and no actual children. ~ Dave Barry

    I always love the fact that so many of these people pretty much disdain kids, pregnancies that might distort their too-thin bodies, and SAHMs — until it happens to them, usually in their late 30’s to mid 40’s. Then it’s like they’re the only women in the world who have EVER given birth and their child is the cutestsmartestamazingest child in the world.


    Great childbirth story, BTW.

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