Forever A Cupid

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Oh Goddess Above.

Posted by Allison on July 24, 2007

Dear Goddess above of all that is holy. I thank thee. After years of slandering your name and making reference to your supposed love of making me look like an idiot, I finally see the light and the way. Clearly all those years of bad dates were to prepare me for this moment. I gladly take the bad dates, sick twisted marriage, extra 40 pounds to get to this day. I understand the joy you must have taken in all my gauge issues , the glee that you experienced at the foot size issue and the satisfaction at tempering my smugness as a superior parent by sending the charming spawn of soul we call The Flash. I even can accept that you found necessary to add to my plight by doubling my portion of chin hair. All is square with me on this day of all holy days. Today you bestowed upon me an honor that I’m sure is only reserved for your most treasured children. Today you lead me to the mountaintop. Utopia is mine. Today my reunion outfit is complete. And it makes me look 20 pounds lighter (40 pounds was an unrealistic prayer thank you for not adding 40 pounds for my greediness) 15 years younger and about 5 inches taller. You are the goddess of all. And yes, I understand that sending my period was just a little bit of cosmic balancing……

One Response to “Oh Goddess Above.”

  1. Knitwhit said

    So aren’t you going to elaborate? I would hope that you’d post plenty of photos of THE GREAT EVENT so we can all feel like we were there. And if you got an outfit that’ll do all you said, I want to know the details. PLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEASE!

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